Thursday, 1 October 2009

Of Autographs, Humour and Wasting Time

Okay so got most of the results back. Generally, I'm quite okay with it. Key word being "Generally". Really going to have to do better for Physics, Biology (In which I got a B but could've gotta an A for), Add Maths (I'm screwed) and History.

This week we've been a mite busy on our "testimonials". I initially thought that testimonials were letters of recommendation or stuff like that from teachers. It turned out to be a form filled with our curricular and school activities signed by our teacher advisor.

We've got the papers before the Raya hols but had absolutely no idea what to do with them. So in a state of Screw It Syndrome (SIS), I simply chucked the whole thing into my file (love that word: chucked. Sounds so...chucky) and left it there to rot and decompose, never mind that it takes about 60-90 days to biodegrade.

Only recently did I save it from decomposing when I pulled the whole thing out on Tuesday and checked the timeline I had in my laptop files (yes, I actually write up a timeline of every event I took part in--thank God to Mum for suggesting I do this back in January. Saved me time trying to figure out what my academic achievements were.)

So I scrolled through my timeline and started writing in pencil all the stuff I did in school. University of New South Wales English assessment, Public Speaking Training and Competition in Sunway College, English Public Speaking Competition in the form of a book review in Form 4 (did Pride & Prejudice, though I based it mostly on the movie which was way more interesting--to me--than the book. You think the judges actually read the book?) which I won second prize for. First prize went to a Form 5. Chemistry Crossword Puzzle which I thought I screwed up badly but ended up getting first prize.

Then on Wednesday, Pn Maziana was telling everyone to hand up our papers on Thursday. That's when everyone started panicking and going around to see how it was done and written. Had mine done with help from Ben, Jeremy, Darrel, David and Chris (who's been having the mickey taken out of him because of his online alias: Rancora. There was this time when Pn Ting asked who was supposed to help Chanti sweep the class and Chris belatedly realised it was him. He got up, and Jit Sun was crowing: Rancora's an ass or something like that. Shite. Forgot that Chris reads my blog. Sorry, kitty-cat. XD)

Since first period on Wednesday was EST, we decided to get our CF signatures from Pn Carol. After that it was a mad dash around the school. Mid year they noticed too many students entering the staff room freely so they had this policy where you could only enter with a pass from a teacher. However when I entered the staff room today with David and Erina to get signatures, it was filled with students. Obviously disregarding the sign on the door that says, 'Pelajar tidak dibenarkan masuk.'

After EST we got back our Add Maths marks, and then we had English. Pn Doreen wasn't here so Erina, Xian Yao, Wee Liam and I left to get signatures. First, we went to look for Mr. Ravi (for scouts) in the disiplin room but before we got there (still have no idea where it is) I spotted him entering a Form 4 class. We were going to enter but he motioned for us to wait outside while the Form 4s (most of who had been ponteng-ing) scrambled back into class. He managed to get them into order when two girls tried to enter surreptitiously by running behind him to their seats. Unfortunately he caught them and yelled at them to stand outside. Then he signed mine, XY and WL's papers.

XY and WL left but Rin and I were hanging about the staff room to find form 3 teacher Pn Wan Hajimah cause we needed her to sign our Ketua Tingkatan/Penolong Ketua Tingkatan posts. Somehow gifted with spotting abilities (hah), I managed to spot her before she went down the stairs and immediately rushed over, desperately asking her to sign.

Went back to class and got Pn Liew to sign my Rumah Ungu (she's one of the teacher advisors) and my Chem Quiz/Olympic Chem Quiz thing.

Then today, they had an emergency seminar about how to write our Testimonials and Surat Akuan. A bit last minute, everyone thought. Wasting our time as well. After which we went back to class to begin the whole signature-seeking process, but we were stopped by Pn Maziana who gave us another paper: surat for the curriculum activities which she forgot to give us. Erina was bloody pissed when she found out that Pn Maziana didn't have time to finish filling the forms for the whole class, did half of the class only, and conveniently stopped at her form. (I'm before Erina in the name list so I got lucky mine was filled up *smirks*)

Erina thinks PM has a grudge against her or something. So we were discussing the whole thing when David mentioned that PM didn't want to see correction tape (a more convenient form of liquid paper) on our paper so whoever had used CR had to redo the whole thing. David and Erina had to redo the whole thing. Then someone said it had to be in BLOCK letters so they had to request more paper just to finish it up.

Halfway through, Erina got so fed up she took her new sheets of paper, and pointed surreptitiously to the left where Gerald was listening to David's iPod and mouthing at me, 'His handwriting big or not?'

Erina's handwriting was small so she wanted someone to fill her form for her. I nodded, cause Gerald's handwriting is really nice for a guy and is probably nicer than mine cause he writes with flourishes in a very artsy way, like he's drawing his name instead of writing it. Hey, no kidding. I saw the way he wrote his name on his Bio 3 paper and it was really nice.

So we waved Gerald down and got him to fill in Erina's paper for her, all the while Rin and I were saying, 'Hey, his handwriting really nice.' and Rin noted that he was trembling and said so. Jit Sun came over, holding his documents as well and plopped down on the chair beside Gerald. 'Hey, they paying you to do this or not?'

When Gerald just smiled, Jit Sun started preening and fluttering his lashes at Gerald, his voice going all feminine, 'Can you fill up for me as well?' We were laughing while Gerald nodded yes.

Then Jit Sun got playful and started asking. 'How is she (nods at Erina) going to pay you?' We looked at him. 'She doesn't have her virginity anymore.'

This caused Erina to let out a loud WEI of indignance. Then I joined in on the fun. 'Yeah, cause she lost it to the table in EduSmart.' In-joke, people. Erina used to joke about losing her virginity to a table in EduSmart.

To retaliate Erina shot Jit Sun with a question. 'So, how are you going to pay him? Didn't you lose yours (virginity) already?'

Jit Sun was unperturbed. 'No lah, unless you count loosing it to my hand.' This caused Erina to let out another Eew and Jit Sun to cackle in wicked delight when the implication of the sentence sunk in.

Later, after all was done, David got so fed-up he went (or got someone) to go to Mr Allen, Penolong Kanan Hal Ehwal Murid (HEM--in charge of student stuff) and asked about the Block letters and correction tape thing.

The final verdict?

Mr Allen said it was alright (since later they were going to type it in anyway.) So David was a bit annoyed he'd done everything for nothing. Thank God I didn't bother to waste paper and ink on redoing my paper when I used a bit of correction tape.

So far I've got most of my signatures: I'm only missing Pn Doreen's signatures for my UNSW and other English related stuff. Gerald, it seems, turned out to be a Scout and Rumah Ungu fellow! Who happens to never show up at meetings. He was even wondering if he could just forge Mr. Ravi's signature for the Scouts column.

Okay, tension over. Now to the hilarious part.

Monday. We were in Physics tuition. Candice and Jit Sun were sitting behind me, and Janice and Ya Jen behind them. Jan was showing Sun her English essay, which started with "I knew that I had..." So Jan was writing, in first person, about a woman with stomach cancer. According to the essay (Sun was reading all the funny bits out), "I" had a husband, Greg (Sun said it was a common name, not bad), and three children, Anakin (Sun and I were like, What?), Jane and Little Logan (confirmed by Jan to be taken from Gilmore Girls).

Turns out that Anakin and Jane were college students while Little Logan was three? six? His age kept coming into question when Sun mentioned that a three year old wouldn't have said the word "coped" (a sentence in the essay). Sun even went on to say that "I" and Greg were really something to have two kids in college and one kid three years old. At one point Sun snorted with laughter, and when Jan protested it was a sad story, he proceeded to sob theatrically.

There was a bit in the essay that said "I" had to be carried by Greg to bed and Little Logan helped by pulling on "My" pants. Here, Sun was shaking his head. 'So young already like that!' I mentioned to Candice that we should keep our kids away from Sun. Overall the story was okay.

Tuesday. Not much happened. At least, not that I can remember. All I remember was the return of the dreaded exam papers. Got an A2 for Bm, my first ever A for BM. All because I got 104 out of 130 for my two essays. English essay was fine but I went down by one point. Maybe I'll type it out and you can agree with me that it's not my best work. It's titled Water. Gerald, who did the water theme, talked about Water the Dog. He got splashed with water cause it was his birthday.

Wednesday. Just realised that most of the fun stuff happens in Chemistry tuition. Tim and his other half sat behind me and Tim kept on borrowing my paper to copy. Elaine finally showed up at tuition after a month of hiatus and Ben and I were busy discussing. We were given a work sheet by Mrs Foo and were doing the essay questions when we got stumped on a question.

It went something like this. It started with A was mixed with B to produce salt C and a colourless liquid (which, we later derived from the equation, turned out to be water). So the next question was (more or less),

Explain a test to confirm the colourless liquid (aka water). The correct answer was to mix it with anhydrous copper sulphate, which will turn from white to blue in the presence of water. But when someone asked Mrs Foo, 'Teacher, how to test water?' This was Montri's clever reply:

'You drink it lah!!'

The whole class burst out laughing, especially us Cempakians Plus One--CPO. (I'm terming us the Majority because in class, Montri, Janice, Candice and her friend Fiona--not really a major deal--fill the second row while Elaine, Ben and I fill the third row. Needless to say, Montri, Jan, Candice, Elaine, Ben and I were the loudest bunch in class. Or was it because the other students were too quiet?)

Montri didn't seem perturbed. 'Really, what. If it tastes like water then is water lorr!'

That, dear readers, is the logic of our very own Thai boy.

The next essay question started with:

What is a salt?

While Ben and I were copying the textbook version from my notes (a salt is an ionic compound where the H+ ions from an acid is replaced by a metal ion or an ammonium ion), Elaine had taken a leaf from Montri's book and devised her own answer.

'You see, must write like that.' Elaine nodded her head sagely. '"Salt? I dunno what salt is. I like sweet things, not salty things." Then you must add a smiley face for teacher to see.'

Ben and I were in hysterics.

Oh, I forgot. Monday, we were getting ready for our last exam cause it was postponed (refer to my last couple of posts--I think I mentioned why). Our class is in Block C. Usually the gates of the staircase is locked, and at seven or so, some students come up to open the gates for us. Jo was one of them.

So that morning, I was checking my watch, muttering about the bloody idiots who kept us waiting downstairs. Got so impatient I went and stood in front of the gates. Chris joined me and I was angrily pointing out the time to him. 'See? It's seven fifteen! Where is the bloody idiot who's going to open the bloody door for us?'

Then Chris started talking to someone I couldn't see. 'Hey, Joseph. She called you an idiot.'

I swung around, and there Jo was, coming to open the gates for us. He was looking at me weirdly. 'Did you call me an idiot?'

'No, I did not!' I was fumbling around. Honestly, I thought it was someone else who was supposed to open the gates for us cause I saw Jo walking up earlier. Chris was laughing and J0 was amused. I think.

Thursday i.e. today. Nothing much. All mentioned above. So now I'm going to play an hour of games (only one hour limit lah) before I go study?


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